Sunday, November 2, 2008

Man Camp

This past weekend was the opening of the Texas rifle season for deer. Myself and my middle son, 12, went. It was just us. Usually, my father and my oldest son,19, also go on opening weekend. This time, the older son had to work, and Dad had a nephews wedding to go to. And no, I don't feel bad about missing the wedding. If they wanted me to go, they should have had it on another weekend.

No, this weekend was just me and my son, East Texas, and our travel trailer. It was what every boy needs, and every mother fears; Man Camp.

Man camp is that place where boys learn what it means to be..., well, the male of the species. Notice I didn't say they learn to be men. Learning to be a man is a lot different. No, Man Camp is where they learn to act like males. It's a chance for the older males to teach the younger important things.

Things like;
Get your dirty socks off the table and throw them on the floor where they belong.
Of course you can wear those clothes for three days in a row.
Get out of the bathroom and go pee outside.

And then there is etiquette;
If you totally foul the bathroom with stench, you must inform the others in the party as loudly and proudly as you can before they enter.
All farts must be commented on. Only pansies and girls pretend they don't happen.
Belching is a sign of contentment.
Quit complaining and scratch the itch!

And the most important lesson, the one that must be remembered:

Never, ever, do these things in front of your mother!

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This week, I am attending school at TCCC Fire Training facility. I am repeating the class that I started last year when I was forced to go to the hospital with a staph infection. I do hope for better luck this time.

And then, lucky me, I'm on duty Tuesday night. I guess I'll be there when the riots in celebration or defeat start.

I hope all the brothers and sisters in the EMS and fire service, and the cousins who are LEOs across the country stay safe.

Mr Fixit

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