Friday, May 4, 2007

I Been Thinking

I'm in the process of change right now, and that has me a bit introspective, or is it retrospective? I don't know, I've just been thinking about the "old days" lately.

I've been thinking of some of the partners I've ridden with on the Box. Some of them I hated every minute I was with them. Some of them I really enjoyed. The few I hated were the kind to make a decision on their own and never consult you. If you disagreed, you were wrong.

The ones I really enjoyed kept me entertained somehow. One was great at a Scottish accent. One was just naturally funny to talk to. They may or may not have been the best paramedics I've ever seen, but we had fun.

And then there are the the ones that I really worked well with. I enjoyed working with them too, but for different reasons than the "funny guys". These guys, we just got each other. We didn't have to talk.

With these guys, we would show up on scene and just do it. We didn't have to go through the "You get this and I'll get that" stuff. Things just got taken care of. We would have a medical call and we would talk to the patient, but not to each other. Once we were in the back of the Box, we never talked. Just did what needed to be done. I'd reach up and get the IV start kit out and ready, when I turned around the bag was spiked and waiting. When I would open the shirt to put the EKG on, the leads would magically appear.

Sometimes a look was all it took. While talking to the patient, my partner would be getting the vitals. He would look up and I just knew that we needed to go now. I didn't know why, and I didn't question. All I knew was he found something we needed to be going. We did. Or maybe we just automatically played the "good paramedic/bad paramedic" roles. For what ever reason we could just read the mood or each others minds or something.

It was like Zen Paramedics or something.

I enjoyed working with those guys because we were effective. We did good because that is what we did. Cause and effect.

I don't make friends very easily. Not because I don't want to, or because I am evil or cold hearted or anything. OK, I am cold hearted but that's not the point. I don't make friends because there are damn few people that I really have a reason to care about. Disregard family and such. I talking about others. The people you work with, the people you meet, the folks you go to church with. Few of those make it onto the list of "Friends".

There are only a handful of people that I am glad I met. That I want to get to know better. Damn few that I feel comfortable telling about my inner demons. And damn few that I want to help with theirs. They tend to be the type of folks that I have more in common with than we think. The kind that I am lucky to have known.

So, to those select few. Thank you for your help. Thank you for sharing yourself with me. Thank you for accepting me as I am. Thank you for being a friend. I hope you know who you are.

Mr Fixit

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