Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Frozen Wonders

Ice and freezing rain. The weather guessers have been talking about it for 4 days. Finally got here. I had to be on duty Monday, so I went in Sunday night, before the fun started. I found someone sleeping in my bed at the fire station, so I pitched camp a few beds down. All snugly warm, it was the first time I had slept at the fire station with my socks off. As I drifted off to sleep, I thought about the weather....

Remember when we were kids and we wanted snow? You know that fun light fluffy white stuff that falls and makes everything so clean looking. Powdery snow that packs into a ball to throw at your friends.

We don't get that in North Texas. What we get in North Texas is neither powder, clean or fun. We get ice. It coats everything. Picture in your mind a hockey rink. Picture the hockey rink the size of Dallas and Ft.Worth.

Now picture Suzy Soccer Mom driving her SUV on it while talking on her cell phone. Picture 40 year old women who just have to get to the mall driving on our giant hockey rink. And let's not forget the guys.... There's Clueless Cliff who really and truly believes that he can drive his pickup at 65mph over a sheet of solid ice. And of course we have careful Carl. He knows how dangerous it is to drive on ice, so while everyone around him is driving at half the posted limit, he drives at 20mph on the freeway.


I start on duty at 7:00am Monday. It's cold. Colder than an ex-wife's heart. It hurts to be outside. The wind chill is a bazillion below zero.

Have you ever thought how much fun it would be to drive a fire truck with a little over eight-thousand pounds of water on the ass end of it. Think about it again. It may be fun when your young and stupid and alone, but when you realize that you have 3 other men trusting you to get them there safely (not to mention their wives that I know and the kids whose pictures I see, who all want daddy to get home).

And of course we have to go out to the wrecks that the morons driving 70mph are in and cause. Here's an idea speed racer; Next time it ices over, stop at your closest convenience store and have a nice steaming cup of slow-the-hell-down. Get yourself an I'm-not-invincible-danish to go with it.

Didn't see anything too serious. Did have a few acute cases of insurance-itis floating around.

Be careful folks. Slow down. If you get a chance to stay home and off the roads, do it.

Mr Fixit


Ambulance Driver said...

Hey Fixit, looks like you unleashed your inner smartass. Keep it up. ;)

BTDT, buddy. Be careful out there...

Rabbit said...

Dang, and I thought my old puckup with manual drum brakes (that got soaked Friday in all the rain) were fun in this weather. I forgot about your sled and all that monkey motion going on in back.

I got up to let the dog out about 5:45 this morning (Wednesday) and saw it was sleeting. Decided that I'd head on over to work down Beltline west; got within 4 blocks of the place and my manager called telling me to forget about it today, that nobody was coming. At least I got a couple of good naps out of it.

Maybe the rain will hold off until Thursday afternoon. Thenagain, they didn't see this coming, did they?

Be safe out there. When we get ice, I think all Texas drivers turn Chinese.