Tuesday, January 30, 2007

The Bomb

OK, I was planning to tell you another story about guns at the fire station. However, Ambulance Driver and I seem to be feeding off each other a bit. His list of pranks brought back sweet sweet memories. Read on....

There was a firefighter who had attained the rank of Driver/Engineer, and then Lieutenant at a single station. To say that the guys who worked with him hated him would be a bit much. He was however known to be a prick at times. He liked to make sure those under him knew he was in charge if you know what I mean.

Upon his promotion to Captain, he was transferred to City Hall. The men rejoiced. He did however continue to come around the station to work out and would give pointed suggestions, just short of orders, to the guys. Because he still came by to work out, he refused to give up his lockers. This caused a bit of a problem for the Lt. that was sent to replace him.

The guys "suggested" that he give up his lockers, or at least one of them. But he was above listening to the guys. They prodded. They hinted strongly. He would have none of it.

Finally, they set The Bomb.

The bomb consisted of a rat trap, a door wedge, a tiny black string, and a coffee filter full of flour.

The wedge was placed on a shelf in the locker just about, oh, head high. On it was placed the rat trap. Not a spring loaded mouse trap of about two by three inches, oh no! A rat trap of about four by eight inches, with a spring loaded lever that can break fingers or throw tennis balls across the room. The trap was placed on the wedge so that the lever, when set, would close toward the opening. Carefully tied onto the trip lever of the trap is a tiny black thread. The other end of the string is tied around a thumb tack stuck into the door of the locker. The string was just long enough to allow the door to open half way. The trap was set, and on the lever was placed a coffee filter about three-quarters full of flour.

On the day that it happened, the Captain had worked out, and came inside to shower and clean up. As he opened the locker "POOF!!" his world went white. He walked out to the main room and declared "This is bullshit! I'm not gonna play that game."

Another driver answered through laughter, "Yeah, but they will."

He vacated the locker a few days later.

There were still traces of white in the locker when the new Lieutenant moved in.

Mr Fixit

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